Why is it so hard to stick with something? This could apply to almost anything but I am referring to ways to get my girls to behave better.
I have tried many things with my daughters. I usually start a reward chart when I am at my wits end. My girls tend to fight with each other and tattle on each other for every little thing and it drives me crazy. I gets days and day of “MOM She looked at me funny” o,r “MOM she put ugly shoes on my Barbie” and so on and so on. It mostly is late afternoon when they get in these awful moods. I have come to wish that there was no five o clock every day.
I often like to start reward charts for my girls. They can earn stars, puff balls, or rocks depending on what kind of system it is. They act much better and really thrive and then a few weeks or even just one week goes by and it wears off. Either I forget to mark the charts or whatever else happens and then we just circle into the unwanted behavior once again.
I try to keep it simple and make the rewards small things that are not overly hard to achieve. I know that being consistent is key.
One of their favorite rewards could be a trip to the dollar store to pick out one item or as simple as an extra story at bedtime.
I love my kids and hopefully they will get out of this annoying fighting habit soon but until then I will keep on trying to win the battle. I guess that is what parenthood is, lots of trial and error.
What have you found that work with disciplining your kids?
Does it ever get hard for you to be consistent? I hope I am not the only one!
Living the Scream
Thursday 3rd of February 2011
I love all of your feedback! I am going to put your advice to use and I am glad I am not the only one that struggles.
life with the Lebadas: I also have a thumb sucker over here. I loved your idea! I'll have to try it.
Life with the Lebedas
Thursday 3rd of February 2011
I find myself making excuses since my girls are little. I was a lot more consistent with my first than i have been with my second and i can tell a big difference in how they act in certain situations. With my oldest, almost 4, we've just started the chart for her 'thumb' sucking. If she keeps her nails pretty and doesn't put them in her mouth she gets a sticker - when she gets 10 in a row she'll get stickers for her nails. It's going good so far but we're only on day 3. It's our first 'reward' chart we've done. I'm looking forward to seeing the results.
Practical Parenting
Thursday 3rd of February 2011
I am definitely consistent with reward charts, but I will say that I lose steam at the end of the day. By 530pm I am just tired and it can be a long road to 7pm! Parenting is hard work, and I understand why it can be hard to keep up the consistency with reward charts and other behavioral systems...especially with more than one kid!
Great post!
Ludicrous Mama
Thursday 3rd of February 2011
Parenting books ad magazines call that time of day "the witching hour." I call it "the bitching hour."Mine's too young for this to really be an issue - at 2, I EXPECT her to not be able to remember and follow all the rules without constantly being reminded and reprimanded!
But growing up, my mom would take away our 'extras' TV time, radio, Walkman (yes. I'm THAT old!) etc. We'd "earn" it back by treating each other with respect, and not dragging every little squabble over to mom. So you might try some system where they earn privileges that they currently enjoy. They'll MISS them and want to earn them back, rather than earning some special treat they didn't already have, and don't know how their life is different or less fun without it. If it gets REALLY out of hand, and there's a lot of disrespect flying around, you take away less tangible things, like privacy, by removing bedroom doors.
The Education Of Ours
Wednesday 2nd of February 2011
Consistency is exhausting with kids. I'm a huge fan of Alfie Kohn, our house runs in it :) It's easy to lose steam, and that's okay. Parenting is all about finding what works well. Good luck!